Diary
Diary
When I’m dead and buried, or
thrown to the wind,
someone will read these words -
a daughter perhaps, or a son maybe -
but these words will live on
further, harder, than me.
I could leave messages today
for the prying eyes of tomorrow,
word-gifts to comfort them,
their mother an enigma who tested
and tried, who fought her battles and
surrendered in the end.
Will anyone care that these words exist?
That today I caught the coach back
from London and ate two fried eggs
on toast sat in front of the TV;
what will this tell the family I do not yet have,
my darling future children?
What will it tell them about their mother,
that once she was thirty-three and
tired and hungry for a better life,
a different life, uncertainty clouding
her view of the future, as it
does for us all; my children
will know this by then, I’m sure,
by the time they read these words -
these words I wrote today thinking of them.
For more poetic inspiration, go here
i am very impetuous about my journals and destroy them as i go along. i bet this horrifies you, doesn’t it?
however, if the journal contained the only copy of a poem voiced as honestly as this one, then i too would be horrified.
x x x x x
i am very impetuous about my journals and destroy them as i go along. i bet this horrifies you, doesn’t it?
however, if the journal contained the only copy of a poem voiced as honestly as this one, then i too would be horrified.
x x x x x
this is breathtakingly beautiful sentiment … x, d
this is breathtakingly beautiful sentiment … x, d
Mmmm. I love this.
I think sometimes what W and G will think when they read my words…Will they know me better? I think so.
oxox happy to see you.
:)
Mmmm. I love this.
I think sometimes what W and G will think when they read my words…Will they know me better? I think so.
oxox happy to see you.
:)
If I could read back over my mother’s words at thirty-three…who she was at that time as a woman, her dreams, desires, plans, it would be a gift–indeed–to me. The flow of your poem is wonderful, the mundane and the profound all together…yes…
Someone will care…our voices record a moment in time, a shared history…I have all of my journals from age twelve on, bound and stacked in the dust beneath my bed. When Petunia is twelve, I will give her the first one to read…just so she can see she isn’t alone in her thoughts–and that I was a twelve year old girl, an eighteen, twenty, and thirty year old one, who lived beyond the frame (as lovely as it is) of “mother”.
If I could read back over my mother’s words at thirty-three…who she was at that time as a woman, her dreams, desires, plans, it would be a gift–indeed–to me. The flow of your poem is wonderful, the mundane and the profound all together…yes…
Someone will care…our voices record a moment in time, a shared history…I have all of my journals from age twelve on, bound and stacked in the dust beneath my bed. When Petunia is twelve, I will give her the first one to read…just so she can see she isn’t alone in her thoughts–and that I was a twelve year old girl, an eighteen, twenty, and thirty year old one, who lived beyond the frame (as lovely as it is) of “mother”.
It amazes me sometimes how we all think alike! or are at the same place at the same time! I’ve been thinking just that, writing something to leave behind when I’m dead and buried. What is it I want said? I’m thinking and thinking! My daughter is 28 and wondering when her life with her mate will begin.Where is HE???!!! I keep telling her she might have to move, the town I live in seems to be OLD! I feel for her every day, I don’t want her to be lonely and alone in this life! Prayers for you too dear girly! Anna and you look like that was a great time, nothing like singing! Singing is medicine for the heart and soul! xo
It amazes me sometimes how we all think alike! or are at the same place at the same time! I’ve been thinking just that, writing something to leave behind when I’m dead and buried. What is it I want said? I’m thinking and thinking! My daughter is 28 and wondering when her life with her mate will begin.Where is HE???!!! I keep telling her she might have to move, the town I live in seems to be OLD! I feel for her every day, I don’t want her to be lonely and alone in this life! Prayers for you too dear girly! Anna and you look like that was a great time, nothing like singing! Singing is medicine for the heart and soul! xo
i agree with left-handed trees; i think, in some part of my soul, i started keeping journals when i was 8 (!) for some future daughter of mine…who i dreamed of and saw before i was able to bear children…
this is exquisite, susannah, as always. the wistfulness, the honesty…it astounds me, really, how you write. gorgeous.
i agree with left-handed trees; i think, in some part of my soul, i started keeping journals when i was 8 (!) for some future daughter of mine…who i dreamed of and saw before i was able to bear children…
this is exquisite, susannah, as always. the wistfulness, the honesty…it astounds me, really, how you write. gorgeous.
susannah, this is so amazingly touching and profound. your voice gives life to these babes lying in wait..your heart singing to them this beautiful lullaby. what a sweet gift.
susannah, this is so amazingly touching and profound. your voice gives life to these babes lying in wait..your heart singing to them this beautiful lullaby. what a sweet gift.
I really love this. Living life is not enough for me, if there’s no permanent (?) record. Not that anyone would be interested.
Destroying journals is an unforgiveable crime!
I am afraid of fire.
I really love this. Living life is not enough for me, if there’s no permanent (?) record. Not that anyone would be interested.
Destroying journals is an unforgiveable crime!
I am afraid of fire.
susannah, what lovely words, they are as you said..”word gifts”, thank you for sharing them with us…M
susannah, what lovely words, they are as you said..”word gifts”, thank you for sharing them with us…M
Susannah,
These words, and all the words you’ve written and will write, will let your grand-childeren and beyond know that you were real and who that real woman was!
Yes, you are giving a gift that will live long beyond your physical presence in this plain.
They will say” I am from her, and I’m glad!”
Write on Susannah, write on……
rel
Oh, and sing for them too ;-)
Susannah,
These words, and all the words you’ve written and will write, will let your grand-childeren and beyond know that you were real and who that real woman was!
Yes, you are giving a gift that will live long beyond your physical presence in this plain.
They will say” I am from her, and I’m glad!”
Write on Susannah, write on……
rel
Oh, and sing for them too ;-)
Your word-gifts will allow them to see your loving heart and womanly spirit! What a legacy of strength and courage!
Your word-gifts will allow them to see your loving heart and womanly spirit! What a legacy of strength and courage!
i absolutely love this…the word diary would make an excellent poetry prompt…
i absolutely love this…the word diary would make an excellent poetry prompt…
Ah, yes!
“Since flesh can’t stay
we keep the breath aloft.
Since flesh can’t stay
we pass the words along.”
–Erica Jong
Ah, yes!
“Since flesh can’t stay
we keep the breath aloft.
Since flesh can’t stay
we pass the words along.”
–Erica Jong
What a gift it will be for your children to have your words to read. It is a wonderful gift, that they will be able to see different and lovely sides of yu through your words. I would loe to have had that insight into my parents.
As always this poem and your writing is so lovely!
XOX
What a gift it will be for your children to have your words to read. It is a wonderful gift, that they will be able to see different and lovely sides of yu through your words. I would loe to have had that insight into my parents.
As always this poem and your writing is so lovely!
XOX
Oh the legacy you are building
so beautiful.
Oh the legacy you are building
so beautiful.
they will know you loved them before they existed.
you have a big and beautiful heart.
they will know you loved them before they existed.
you have a big and beautiful heart.
Y’know I love the idea of this – of writing to your future children, even small everyday things. I think most kids have to be well into being adults themselves before they realize how very human their parents are and what a great thing to read then – notes from different times in your life. Cool!
Y’know I love the idea of this – of writing to your future children, even small everyday things. I think most kids have to be well into being adults themselves before they realize how very human their parents are and what a great thing to read then – notes from different times in your life. Cool!
writing to your future children. my goodness this is gorgeous.
to peek inside the words of my own mother at that age…i have only had the chance through a few letters she wrote my grandmother that have made their way to me. how your children will treasure this my friend.
you. amaze. me.
writing to your future children. my goodness this is gorgeous.
to peek inside the words of my own mother at that age…i have only had the chance through a few letters she wrote my grandmother that have made their way to me. how your children will treasure this my friend.
you. amaze. me.
This is lovely – you write so well and honestly that I’m sure any writing that you leave will truly help those who read it to know you better.
This is lovely – you write so well and honestly that I’m sure any writing that you leave will truly help those who read it to know you better.
I’m different I suppose. I want my kids know to know me as mom. While they are still kids..not much longer. Then, when they do not need absolutes..I can let them see the grey in me. I’ll give them this gift when I am holding my grandkids and pushing them towards the door to take a break. Then I hold my yet to be grandbabies… and to them I will be Grammy. Just grammy…and after I die..my girls can say..holding their own grandbabies..Oh She was SO MUCH more complicated..and turn over my words. A time and a place for all things.
I’m different I suppose. I want my kids know to know me as mom. While they are still kids..not much longer. Then, when they do not need absolutes..I can let them see the grey in me. I’ll give them this gift when I am holding my grandkids and pushing them towards the door to take a break. Then I hold my yet to be grandbabies… and to them I will be Grammy. Just grammy…and after I die..my girls can say..holding their own grandbabies..Oh She was SO MUCH more complicated..and turn over my words. A time and a place for all things.
your words will tell them of you, things they will not have seen with their own eyes
and your words will tell them about themselves, that they come from a place of love and trust and honesty
beautiful words, susannah
your words will tell them of you, things they will not have seen with their own eyes
and your words will tell them about themselves, that they come from a place of love and trust and honesty
beautiful words, susannah
We were thinking alike this week, thinking about the words we would leave behind. Your words are always beautiful and strong, even whey they are reflections of your sadness and tears. I don’t believe you will write of surrender, but of eventual victory. You have that in you, and you will write it down. xo
We were thinking alike this week, thinking about the words we would leave behind. Your words are always beautiful and strong, even whey they are reflections of your sadness and tears. I don’t believe you will write of surrender, but of eventual victory. You have that in you, and you will write it down. xo
I go back and forth about journals and whether or not to keep them for others to read. I´m glad you shared your words here. xo
I go back and forth about journals and whether or not to keep them for others to read. I´m glad you shared your words here. xo