I honestly didn’t know I had it in me to be a teacher. Teaching is standing in front of a classroom, surely? It’s exams and text books and grading. It’s what people with The Knowledge do and for the longest time I felt I had no knowledge. I had nothing to share. Yet I’m sitting here putting the finishing touches to my newest course — I am so proud of this one, I think it might be my best — and preparing the space for two more of my babies, and it just hit me that I am, in fact, a teacher.
I’ve been doing this running-of-courses thing for four years now (four!) and with every year that passes I get better at doing it. I know how to make an ecourse awesome. I know how to share information in a way that’s inspiring and encouraging. I know how to build online community. I know how to decant my passions into a course format and share them with others in a way that makes sense. And I really love doing it. I love writing and creating and sharing.
I still have wobbly moments when I wonder who am I to be teaching. But then I remind myself that I’m not teaching quantum physics or cake decorating, two subjects that are equally baffling to me :) No, I’m teaching the stuff that I know inside out. I’m also sharing the contents of my heart, I realised, as I wrote deeper into the journalling course.
When I was studying photography at college 20 years ago I had no idea that something called the internet would be invented, and digital cameras, and phones with cameras (how Buck Rogers is that?). When I was working as a journalist I didn’t know my writing skillz would eventually be shared on the internet for all to see (and without an editor, no less!) When I was healing my way through loss I didn’t know that the lessons I was learning, the unravelling I was doing, would be worth sharing with other women years later. On the internet.
It’s funny how things work out.
I honestly don’t take any of this for granted. I sometimes wonder what I’d be doing now if I hadn’t started a blog in 2006. That blog was the beginning of so much — it’s probably just as well I didn’t know that at the time. The other day someone asked me what I did for a living, and I ummed and ahhed as I usually do, because I never know how to explain what I do. But then I smiled and simply said: I write, I take photographs and I teach.
I think it’s time for me to claim the teaching thing. Which I guess makes this my coming out post ;-)
The spring sessions of Unravelling and Photo Meditations both start on Monday — I’ll leave registration open till Saturday in case you’d like to join us. Journal Your Life will run again in the summer xo